U/s: A poem

Do you remember?
How we used to stay up all night texting and calling about nothing
Running lines of poetry together like it was our natural speaking voices
Something out of Bronte or Sanchez
It was us....

Remember how you had pet names for my pussy... Sight unseen
You knew she was sweet before you even had a taste
and when you did
You said she gave you a toothache
You said the aching hasn't stopped
Just moved to a dull fire in your belly
I remember that
Us.

Yo.. How you gonna tell me about all the things you wanted to show me
Special brews and spells you wanted to cast. Old vinyl you wanted to play
As you bent me over mud cloth pillows
Teasing and stroking
Slow dancing to the music in our heads
How you gonna promise me that?
But it was so you
It was us...

Modern machinery archives old messages between us
Cute flirtations that melted into heat
Made me giggle like my inner 12 year old
FaceTime led to face time where we couldn't face time...
I swear.. If you woulda told me to run away with you, i woulda said yes.
Nothing to lose
Everything to gain.
I'd gain you
We'd gain us.

I wanted make a meal of your dimples and drink it down with your smile
Leaving your fragrance in my Locs
Shit.. I was trying to get pregnant by you.
Perhaps not with physical being but maybe with metaphorical atmospheres.
Didn't you want that?
For. Us?

I wanted to fry you chicken butt naked in an apron
Cause you'd appreciate that shit
Let you bend me over the kitchen counter to say "thank you"
Over and over
Breaking dishes you'd promise to replace but
Probably wouldn't
Funny.. That was so us.
Well.. Coulda been us.

I lied to you. I said I was falling for you. And truth is.. I loved you.
Fuck it.. I still do.
And even if I had another man I'd leave him for you.
On everything I would
He's no you
And we are no us


Been substituting sex for intimacy
Compartmentalizing my emotions
Because it's easier this way
He doesn't know the depths of me
Vocabulary of love
The curve of my smile
Or how wet I can truly be
Because he and i can never
Like we were.
Be an us.

I+U= US
Alphabetical mathematically
Astrologically made sense
Speaking in metaphysical binary code
Dick could speak Morse code
Tapping into wavelengths and dimensions
You coulda told me Jesus was blue
And the sky was green
And I'd believe you
Because you and I
Were the truth
Us..


So let us
Be us
All over again.