Sex and The Southern Belle

Being happy shouldn't be this hard. I've committed myself to grabbing life by the balls and going hard in the paint for the pursuit of happiness and blissfulness. Remember...the mantra is "Bliss is your Birthright" *sigh* But.... Just 2 months into these grandiose plans, they appear to be thwarted by some mystic figures I like to call Fate and Fuckery. Let's start with Fate, shall we? Fate is working my nerves. She's having a field day on my last black one that I possess. She's fucking with me on the job, making a mockery of the hard work I do. As soon as I feel 1 steps ahead, I get knocked down 2 steps. I feel like I'm drowning. I feel unappreciated but this is the fate I chose of being a worker/student. No one at work understands and no one at school realizes I'm doing the best I can. In under a pressure cooker ...boiling and festering. Speaking of school, I feel like a novice even going into the end of my 2nd year of PhD wor...

You interact me  feelings in continuum   just react to you You have done nothing to make me feel what I feel what I feel is you  I drink your praises   chased down with absolute truth Selah....yes...Selah This heart of mine bears secrets for you so deeply   buried in my soul Pussy isn't free but my pussy I'd give you  ever so freely I lick your dimples tongue feels hollows of your cheek in my hand you're hard  Sugar coated kiss placed at the nape of my neck  so I know it's real It's dark and stormy Just like the drink in your hand It matches my heart I swim in oceans pools of molasses and brown  the depths of your eyes I apologize  not with my words or phrases  With open, wet mouth I do disservice to your neglected, poor heart My kisses shall heal Introspective you Meeting Retrospective Me Brings us perspective It's getting so late But too early to clo...

The Roots.  Period. The single, most dopest RAP band that ever lived. What am I saying?? .They are the ONLY rap band that ever lived!! Formed in Philly back in the 90s with Ahmir "QuestLove" Thompson  and Tariq "Black Thought"  Trotter, at the helm, the Roots merge experimental jazz, hip hop and even a little soul to create their brand of funk. Before they becamse Jimmy Fallon's Alabama Porch Monkeys House band, they were putting out the dopest music ever.  Working with the likes of Jill Scott, a young, fresh faced Eve, and Cody Chestnutt, and even soul singers John Legend and Betty Wright,  the roots defy what it is to be "neo soul" or hip hop...  And they still are, Their album "Undun" has been in my Ipod rotation for a while... My fav song, aside from "Silent Treatment" and "You Got Me" (written by Jill Scott, performed w/ Erykah Badu) has to be their song "Break you Off" w/ Musiq. (Fun fact..D...

Hell naw. Fuck that. I dont want to be your girlfriend. I'm a grown ass woman With needs and desires I got curves and dips and hips Things beyond the teenage concept of this word. Girlfriend? Nah bruh... I'm not trying to be his Girl.. Or girlfriend. Fuck that. My age has transcended that. I'm trying to be your earth..your necessary feminine energy.  My pussy is a wave ocean of orgams. You'd drown in this... No...this isn't any girlfriend shit. You don't finger this in the back of a school bus In the lockeroom or hallways You bow down to the altar of woman hood On your knees Speaking in tounges. Cunningly This aint no girlfriend shit... Period Nope. Not trying to be a "girlfriend". No.  I wanna be the air you breathe. Your sunshine in the rain. I want to be the peace in your life. I want to be more than a girl who is your friend. Not your girlfriend. The reason your dick stays hard  and makes mornings bearable... The re...

Just wanted to tell you all that I appreciate the love you show me, especially when I bear my soul on here. You are my therapy . The blog is my release . It's just that simple. Ase'

*stolen from the blogger homie MoetwithMedusa  Thanks bruh!* I was teased relentlessly in school Teased about everything...but especially my hair and weight. I struggled with my weight for a really long time I tried to be bulimic...until I realized I liked the taste of food I'm still trying to be a video vixen body with a Condi Rice brain... I hate to waste money But I shop sometimes to fill a void I text because I hate the sound of my voice I get really angry when I feel like no one is listening or valuing what I say I tried to commit suicide when I was 21 It was over some bullshit My dad was mostly mad about the hospital bill My dad is a source of a lot of pain Speaking of which..he still brings up the money he "wasted" on a wedding reception. But...surprisingly...we're getting better. Yet I resent my mother for staying I lie about how many "siblings" I have because honestly I don't know I'm a fantastic artist and painter but n...

Love jones . Period. The movie that defined a new generation of black men and women : Generation X, neo-soul retro New Negros.... Educated in Franz Fanon , Al Green, Malcolm X, and bell hooks. Eating turkey bacon and having brunch. Brown sugar babies. Brown skinned dapper dudes . Going to pretentious poetry spots, drinking dark liquor on ice and quoting Eldridge Cleaver and Maya Angelou while puffing on a L...on some new age philosophy which wasn't new at all. Black power, civil rights, and women's liberation- fed children.... At the cusp of the new millennium . Love jones. Period. The movie that defined me. Late teens/early 20s. Single handily my favorite movie of all time. How many times have I watched it? At Least 200. And that is no exaggeration . I wanted to be Nina . I wanted to live in a fly ass loft. I wanted to be brown and glowing . I wanted to be sexy with a camera. I wanted to be so fly men were powerless around me. I wanted my stuff to be so good that...

I was deeply saddened at the passing of Whitney Elizabeth Houston, the undisputed Queen of Pop, at the age of 48, just one night before the Grammys in Los Angeles last Saturday. Like every little Black girl in America, Whitney was like my version of Princess Diana; glamorous, elegant, and always poised (at least from the outside looking in). I took my hairbrush and looked in the mirror and sang lyrics far too adult for my tender ages. I wanted to be her. She was brown and glowing. She had a 10000 watt smile and was a diva from the start.  Whitney was from musical royalty: Her mother Cissy was part of the group the Sweet Inspirations; her first cousin was Dionne Warrick; her Godmother was Aretha Franklin. She recorded her first song as a background artist to Chaka Khan on "I'm Every Woman" (a song in which she re-recorded for The Bodyguard soundtrack that went on to break records). She was destined to be nothing but greatness. After her first television appearance on th...

I am earth Gaea deep and wide Full of water and mass Inhabited by feelings diverse I see you tumbling toward me You are dense and massive Rock ablaze. Coming at me Hard and steady Interplanetary collision Set for my heart I hide it... This love In my core Hot and heated Unsure and unwavering Volatile and steaming I don't want you here But I need to feel you Here. Foreign object with eyes on me Beaming orbs of obsidian Set on a course A course plotted by the divine. I pray I pray you reach me unscathed Nevertheless... I feel like we are both asteroids And like an asteroid . Feels like this love was destined to collide, burn and crash Into the atmospheres Before feeling its impact How fleeting it was A shooting star A spinning top Supernova swallows us whole Never to return the same again My tears are a meteor shower Pounding on my chest Pulsating with fear No impact felt You've faded Back into galaxy Maybe in another lifetime We...

Someone loves me!!! :) (ok so it was my parents! Lol)

I was talking to one of my bff's, purging my soul out to her about a matter of my heart. It seemed rather painful at the the time (but in hindsight I'm not sure why I hurt so bad ). I was trying to hold it together but felt like i was going to choke on my sorrow. When I finally finished, she told me rather plainly : "Do not cry over him. He isn't worth it" I snapped back. " If I want to cry , then I will cry" ...and I let out a wail so primal, so gut wrenching that I scared myself. I knew I would cry. And cry is just what I did. I cried. I locked my door and cried. I soaked my sweater sleeves and cried. I had balled up tissue and cried. I had the asthmatic wheezing type of breathing and cried. My nose as running and my MAC was ruined. I was flush. My stomach hurt. My eyes were red. I cried not because he had done anything wrong. I cried because it felt like the same old game and run around I'd been getting for the past 3 years now. I cried be...

FEELING getting complimented on my locs Rachel Roy is just the dopeness sexy text messages that are so random they make you blush Sadly..Phaedra might be my favorite RHOA.  Her and Apollo are kinda hot together..Im jealous..  Their baby is the CUTEST I want a baby *sigh* (LOL) That my mother is totally on board with my getting a donor...just so long as he is smart AND handsome My brother would be an awesome, spoiling uncle.... I'll be 34 next year. Trust me..if that ain't the time to do it...I dunno WHEN it will be.... Spring is just around the corner... I think I am FINALLY breaking out of the "types" that I normally date. cocky these days. Like..the Rihanna album is my soundtrack...like when I walk.."Birthday Cake" plays...(LOL) For example..I told a dude I was gonna "have him". What?? Like..when did this new MochaPeach come out?? Must be cause I'm getting close to the "35 and dont give a damn" marker. Great about my finances... M...

I've been a fan of Alanis since I was a brooding teenager, locked away in my room listening to grunge, hip-hop, and Jazz (I was weird...yeah). But anyway, Alanis' "Jagged Little Pill" was the album that defined a major love and break up of my teenage years.  I really liked my HS boyfriend...we broke up and made up probably 100 times during the course of 9th through 12th grades (LOL). This year, it was VERY bad, as I found out he tried to holler at a girl who rode my school bus....(alas....she didn't make the cut and I did...BOOM..maybe cause I scared the sh*t outta him...anyway...LOL) Released in 1995, Jagged Little pill went on to sale over 30 million copies and earned Alanis a sh*t load of Grammys, sealing her dopeness and influence on a ton of other pop=rockers to come: Fiona, Pink, Avril to name a few. The Canadian singer-songwriter is a little folk, a lot of rock, and a lot of indie pop. Some may know her for her time on "You Cant Do That on Televisi...

Feeling * roses . I think they are so beautiful to look at. White ones are my favorite. * all this chocolate! I go into diabetic shock  * dressing up and going out on a fancy date . That's always fun * red is my favorite color so red is everywhere  * red lingerie. Nuff said * doing it ( shrug) Condom sales be thru the roof. * diamonds *chocolate covered strawberries. * some guys really do put their best foot forward for valentines day * I hate Vday themes parties. * the movie Valentines Day is always gonna be on from now on  * being single is good. I mean you can have multiple dates right ? Lol * love songs all day long * lots of babies will get conceived lol * mushy commercials *spa specials * maybe I'll have a valentine this year * kissing  * champagne is everywhere!  * surprises at work. Flowers etc * I miss the old school parties you had in school w/ the little candy grams from classmates  Not Feeling: ...

The 2000s were the years that defined my "adulthood". It was all about neo-soul, smooth vocals and rich melodies. While Maxwell is and always will be my favorite singer, only one man during that era had the OTHER key to my musical heart, D'angelo . Born Michael D'Angelo Archer in Richmond, VA, D'Angelo burst onto the music scene as one of the forefathers and architects (along w/ E. Badu, Maxwell, Jill Scott, etc) of Neo Soul. Heavily influenced by Prince (as seen in that Untitled video) and Marvin Gaye, D'angleo droped Brown Sugar. The guy looked the part of a rapper and yet sat down to the keys and belted out a sexy ode to weed. (LOL). I might have even had a a hot, young adult make-out session to his version of "Crusin"... I love so many D'angelo songs. But VooDoo, his last studio album to date, still reigns supreme. It of course, had the now infamous "Untitled" (with his half naked video). My favorite off that album was "S...