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Showing posts from February, 2018

Step Your P****y Up

I will be 39 in a month. I am having a midlife crisis. A literal, mid-life crisis.
The job of mothering and wife-ing (lol) is a difficult one.  And add on top of that knocking on the 40s door.... and not feeling like you've achieved jack shit. I haven't traveled the world enough. Bought enough shoes. Eat fancy foods. Had sex with Matt Kemp... Had enough orgasms. Lost enough weight. Driven the car of my dreams. Paid off enough debt... making sex figures...wrote my epic historical fiction novel... worn enough hairstyles...
Blah! I've not done jack squat. *sigh* WHat Id o know is, the unpaid, emotional labor of mothering and being a wife has driven me off track and off my goals. A lot of them. I am having to retool and refocus. In lamenting to my husband, he goes "I mean you can still travel the world! With Us". Before I could control my facial expressions, I scowled. "A baby? Strapped to my back and a husband to weigh me down as I go see the Pyramids?? No tha…

A Love Like Taffy

I was in one of the many online/Facebook groups that I am in (I have a real addiction I believe....) and the discussion of marriage and its up and downs began. Naturally, women started this discussion and men sorta interjected here and there. (SN: I often wish men spoke positively and naturally about marriage the way women do....alas.... all we get are Fred Flinstone types...)

I relayed my experiences as a woman under 40 and working on my second marriage. My exact words were...

What I’ve learned in two marriages, one disastrous and one fairly new but relatively healthy, is that you learn to become like taffy:  You start out one big, sweet sticky mess. Then...you stretch, you grow, you pull, you push but if you’re lucky, you don’t break. And that’s the sweet spot.  

And when one of my good friends who was engaged said she fears marriage because she was a "hot mess"... I laughed and said, "Marriage is the joining of two hot messes....". And I continued on with my taf…