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Showing posts from July, 2017

The Intersection

I am at the intersection of "Fuck it All" and "Think This Thing Through"...
Oh btw.. this blog is about career and professional goals... (if you don't want to read any further).
I do not dislike my job. But it has run its course and served its purpose. I've been serving in an administrative capacity in High Ed for close to 15 years now. It was my first job out of graduate school. And while it wasn't my dream job of junior editor at Random House, it was a job that allowed a steady paycheck, benefits, and had the familiarity of school. If there is one thing i know, it is that I know University and how it works. And I am good at it. I've had promotion after promotion, title changes and bigger offices. But I've grown tired. 
The truth is.. I am not living my purpose. And I know my purpose is to write. I am almost 40.. so I keep wondering if it is too late.. but then I remember JK Rowling was 40.. Vera Wang was 40...Stan Lee...Samuel L. Jackson... all…

Randomness: Friday

What do you talk about when you're out of words? 
I committed to write once a week on this blog. And I have done so faithfully since recommitting myself. But what do I write about when words fail me?  

I want to travel. I want to take a nice, relaxing trip without the baby and just my husband..

I need to stop shopping. I realize now I shop to fill a void. And It's not like I am going anywhere. Or NEED the things right then and there. But I just often can't resist a sale. And that is reeking havoc on my credit score and debt to income ratio. I can't keep doing that. I seriously need a financial advisor. Straight up

Because of said spending. I said I wanted to recommit to myself to a minimalist lifestyle. I dont know how I can do that when SOMETIMES you gotta shop....

But I have to shop for my kid.. because she is growing at an exponential rate. Her shoes are now too small. She needs bigger tops. She needs less bodysuits so she can potty-train. I am just in awe at how fas…

I Had Hope For Other Hair: Confessions in Black Motherhood

I had hoped for other hair...
(My Little One Reading a Book Before Bed)

... for my daughter.

No, I didn't want her to have "good hair"... hair that ebbed and flowed close to the weight of Whiteness. I didn't want that for her.  I didn't want her to have hair that was deemed "managable" or "a good grade". as if you can give hair letter grades or grade it on a curve.

I just wanted her to have any hair other than MY hair. She inherited my hair. And I cried.

When I found out I was having a girl, anxiety was replaced with dread. "Dear God.. I have to learn how to do hair". See, growing up, my mother was my stylist, even way into high school. So in between salon visits, she would relax or press my hair. She'd style it or comb it. And I never worried about it. I tried and tried to do my own hair... and failed. The only style I could keep up were Brandy-inspired box braids (which some poor, Senegalese woman would do for hours) or a very sho…