I am 30. I am divorced. I'm in debt. I sold my still new house I have no car. I hate my job. I still don't have my Ph.D. I never had children with my ex husband. I've never been pregnant or had a real scare. I’m not dating anyone and don’t have any real prospects ...yet and still... I want to have a baby. All around me...friends are getting pregnant or working on baby #1...or even #2. I'm so happy and overjoyed for them. Honestly...I shouldn't even be thinking about this. I just sold my house (which had plenty of room for children). I am getting out of a marriage and dating again. I am trying to get my finances in order. I am trying to lose more weight and obtain some goals. But something about me pains for a child of my own. I feel like there is hole in my heart.... I had resolved myself to adopt or even be a fantastic step mother (if I were to ever get married again). I mean...years ago I had resolved to not even be a mother at all...and as my marriage went south....