Sex and The Southern Belle

I was in one of the many online/Facebook groups that I am in (I have a real addiction I believe....) and the discussion of marriage and its up and downs began. Naturally, women started this discussion and men sorta interjected here and there. (SN: I often wish men spoke positively and naturally about marriage the way women do....alas.... all we get are Fred Flinstone types...) I relayed my experiences as a woman under 40 and working on my second marriage. My exact words were...   What I’ve learned in two marriages, one disastrous and one fairly new but relatively healthy, is that you learn to become like taffy:  You start out one big, sweet sticky mess. Then...you stretch, you grow, you pull, you push but if you’re lucky, you don’t break. And that’s the sweet spot.   And when one of my good friends who was engaged said she fears marriage because she was a "hot mess"... I laughed and said, "Marriage is the joining of two hot messes....". And I continued ...

Yesterday I was mad. I mean boiling-point mad, at my fiance'. I think it's the stress of everything. Wedding planning. New Home. New Job. My mother being ill. I've been ill......a lot of stuff. And it all spilled over one fateful Monday. Well actually, to be fair, it started on Sunday, and spilled over into Monday. I had had it up to HERE with everything, and that included my fiance' (quite unfairly). We rode to work together in relative silence, only chuckling here and there over the morning radio show. As I exited the car, I said "Ok bye"...and entered my building. Later on that evening, he returned home. He said his day was "just ok" which to me translated into it being kinda crappy. I was like "Oh"....and he said something very poignant: "When I dropped you off, you didn't give me my sugar (kiss). When you kiss me, that's my covering for the day...........I missed my sugar. Even if I am mad at you or vice-versa, ...

(no that's not me...or my groom! LOL) *blows dust off this puppy* Hey y'all! It's been far too long since I've blogged. But my good friend @EarthAngel172 on Twitter was curious about me..how was doing and how the wedding plans were going! Now that I was forced to sit my booty down  (I had some minor outpatient surgery...no worries..I'm good)...I can now s it and am forced and I am willing to write this blog. Wedding planning is...well.....I will say that I've learned so much as a bride for the second time. Here are the highlights 1) You Cannot Compare Apples to Oranges...  so stop doing it !! This experience of being a bride for the second time is not going to be like the first time. It's not. Our major arguments and disagreements during this process have largely been about "Hey..I did that the first time so I don't wanna do it again". Silly stuff. Like a personalized aisle runner. Or who to invite...or even having a wedding ...