Sex and The Southern Belle

(Photo courtesy of Montoya Turner and Made You Look) Well...well...well. I know. I had the nerve to come back to you all married ...and not without a single HELLO or anything! Well.........let me fix that. Hello, darlings! :) After one heck of a fun wedding (I know...says the woman who was adamant about not even having a wedding) and to one SUPER romantic honeymoon....(whew chile..if a baby was made from that I wouldn't be surprised), I realized I've neglected my blog for a minute. I wrote a rather somber piece after the whole Ray Rice incident. But enough somberness....let's celebrate......... I think I may do a bit of a  quick and dirty "recap"..... and throw in a few pics here or there....... just a few. The weeks leading up to the wedding were def more hectic than the wedding weekend itself.  I even had a shower in my office after I told them NOT to go through all the hassle. It all started on Thursday when I met The Dude's extended f...

Me and my fiance' had a bit of a disagreement last week... No. I wont get into the details of what it was about because that is between us. But I will say I learned a valuable lesson. (This is a bit of a paraphrase/mash-up of the situation but bear with me...the lesson still stands) I had my arms folded. My lip poked out (not in a snotty 13 year old kind of way but in a tired, old Grandma frustration kind of way). I walked in the door and didn't say a word to him. Not even hello. I heard him say "Well hello to you too............" and I closed my door. I took off my clothes and got in bed. I figured it was best I just avoid him.....give him some "space" before I blew it up out of proportion. Later, he climbed in next to me and I was asleep, truly asleep. He leaned over wearily and asked "Are you awake?" I groaned and grumbled, upset my sleep was disturbed and said "I WAS ASLEEP" in my most annoyed voice. He sighed. He tried to...

subtitled : The Last Blog in which I will EVER talk about divorce I started this blog as a way to heal from my divorce. But guess what....everything has to come to an end. I am so over it. I am over talking about how to heal..what to do...how to date...etc. I've done the work. I've come out shining and like a champ.  Everyone feels like I am the go-to expert on how to bounce back after divorce. While I am flattered...again...it's got to stop. I've moved on. And so should my readers. Nevertheless....this is a blog post about divorce. *shrug* As I approach my Mid-30's (Ok let's face it...34 is prob already mid-30s), I realize that most of my "give a damn" gave out a long time ago. I've hit a stride. And while I do have fear and apprehension about a lot of major decisions in life, one thing is clear: Who gives a damn what other people think. When I got divorced almost 5 years ago, I had this shame and guilt.  I felt like a failure.  Looking...

Over the weekend, a friend (a very fine, a very smart, and a very sexy....well..you get the point...an XY friend )...asked me the following question: "What makes you a good wife?" He wasn't talking about the GENERAL "you"...he meant ME...as in specifically Mocha. I sat there dumbfounded and stunned for about 20 minutes, not knowing how to answer him. You see...after my divorce, I've done nothing but concentrate on my failures as a wife. It is hard to see the forests for the trees. When it all seems bleak, you rarely see the good. I feel I was, in essence, a rough draft wife. A good starter wife for a first marriage. But I didn't get a chance to be proofread or fine tuned....turned into a manuscript worthy of publication. If you had to ask my ex, the WASband, what made me a good wife, his answer would be bleak: "You ran and managed an organized house. Cooking was a bonus" In other words, I was a glorified maid....the help. ( Or wors...

As 2009 slowly comes to an end and the holiday season slowly draws to an end, I realize that so much has changed. Yet, is “real” change ever possible…..in regards to forgiveness. My ex husband and I have come a very, very long way in terms of being cordial and forgiveness. You see, there was a time where I really hated his guts and wanted nothing to do with him. He broke my heart into tiny shards of bloody glass and I didn’t want to even speak to him. He tried to send me text messages..I’d send ones back..cursing. I didn’t want him near me. He sent flowers via my mother and I got so angry I threw them on the ground in front of my apartment (Later, I went back and picked them up…and sat them on my counter..). In other words, I didn’t want to have anything to do with him. Earlier in the summer, my mother had gotten very ill and was in the hospital. We thought she had a stroke but it was due to improper dialysis. She asked for my ex husband and he came. At the time, I was seeing someone ...