Feeling/Not Feeling: The NYE Edition

FEELING

• NYE signals that  the BS from the past year is over
• I've had a trying year...a GOOD but trying year...but I am ready to BOUNCE to 2012
• Iv'e already kicked my fitness goals into high gear.
• I gotta keep these resolutions Seriously...
• Hearing "What are you doing NYE?" followed by "Baby It's Cold Outside" LOVE those songs
• The Ball drop in Times Square....(or our little Peach Drop in ATL)
• I'm still celibate. I've stayed strong
• Maybe I'll get some in 2012 (LOL)
• Watchnight Service
• The movie New Year's Eve. I wanna see that....
• Kissing at the stroke of midnight
• 2012 signals almost being done w/ this Phd...Praise Jehovah
• NYE fireworks
• I feel that 2012 is about to be a BREAKTHROUGH year! I'm excited (for me and a friend I've been praying deeply for)

NOT FEELING

• Paying crazy amounts of money for NYE parties. Normally..the joint would be $10 to 15 on a regular night. Now you wanna charge me $150 to sit in a raggedy pleather VIP section w/ some old ass bottle of Moet?? Negative
• Hence..I wanna go out but NOT pay...but....
• I don't have a date. BOO on thatt! *smh*
• So It's gonna be me and Dick Clark and a bottle of Prosecco
• Since Im working out....then I gotta keep that isht up.
• I dont wanna break my resolutions...
• That's gonna be hard 
• Going into 2012...still single...and celibate
• going to Watchnight service.....drunk (LOL) and or/ in your club clothes
• I hate Auld Lange Syne. I hate that song. 
• I'd rather be in Vegas...doing something stupid...like..getting married (LOL)
• I feel that 2012 is about to be a BREAKTHROUGH year! I'm scared :( 

Thursday Tunes: What Are You Doing New Years?

My mother's favorite singer of all time is Nancy Wilson. When I was young, she would play all her classics. She's a standard in Blues and Jazz. Affectionately known as "Fancy Miss Nancy", she was responsible for hits such as "Guess who I saw Today".

But what I remember her most was her rendition of "What Are You Doing New Years?". Given that  NYE is fast approaching, I thought I'd share this classic.

I hope you find someone special to share your NYE with.


Welcome to 2012!!!

Ready-Whip: A Poem

I remember when I was a kid

And would sneak the can of whipped cream
From the back of our fridge
which was supposed to be just a sweet topping
On rare occasions

And hold my head back

Mouth gaping

And squirt and squeeze the aerated goodness in my mouth

Pause

Breath

And gulp it all down

And sometimes for good measure

Drown it out with some Hershey syrup.

It was innocent

but delightfully sinful

A midnight snack

Sugar laden

Empty calories

I’d lick my fingers

And giggle to myself.

No one knew my saccrine secret

But I can’t do that with you.

Or Can i?

Carnal aching

Desire baking

My midnight snack

That no one knows I digest

Like a hot apple pie

With the a la mode being you

Creamy

Dreamy

Your rock-hard Ready-Whip in a can

A perfectly sculpted

Bronze vessel

That would expel sweetness on demand

Damn man…

That’s it.

I have to digest you

Ingest you

Inhale you

To get you out of my system

I have to put you into my system.

Then after that..

I can go on a diet.

Sex and the Southern Belle: The Year in Review

When He Writes: A Poem

When he writes poetry about me
It will look like sticky brown sugar
Reduced down
Until it bubbles and runs over
Magic and sex
Hot and scalding
He'll make me feel like 
My ego isn't worth the praise
Words.. Honey comb dipped metaphors
As if his vocal cords belong to a lyre 
He plays piano on my thighs with his tongue
Sometimes it's Mozart sometimes it's Monk
My eyes read his lips that linger with a smile
Full of sunshine and inaudible laughter
I drink his scent
His flesh warm to my touch
Evaporated heat of a cinnamon stick and warm brandy meld
I bite down on my lip
When I think of us
Together
Stripped down, into one pool of orgasms. 
I desire him. 

Then I wake up
Looking over at an empty pillow where his head should be
No imprint of how he laid down
No lingering scent
No honey coated melody of his "good morning" 
No rush to jump out of bed to brew coffee and add 3 shots of cream to match his complexion
I think of when he wrote poetry to me
Only to realize they weren't poems at all
Just the same tired script he used again and again.
Saying the same lines
Loving the same way
Proposing on even the same day
One day someone will write poetry about me
One day it'll be original
One day
When he writes poetry to me.

Thursday Tunes: Simply Red....

I love the 80s. I especially love 80s music...where music was music and no one cared the color of the person singing the song. Enter Simply Red....the band headed by the red headed, blue eyed British soul brother.....of the 80s who had hit after hit... but my favorite is  "Holding Back the Years"

WHen I first heard this song,  I knew then it was something special. I was young. Yet almost 25 years later I realize that the song had much more importance than I knew. Often we hold on to memories...the years we spent with someone...only to realize it is futile. YOu have to let go....because nothing was really there at all.

 As Simply Red sings.. "I've wasted all my years....wasted all those tears....And nothing had the chance to be good...cause nothing ever could"


But I'll keep holding on..... 


(or in my case...holding out for the right one :) )

Feeling/Not Feeling: The Holiday Season

(Christmas in Atlantic Station: Atlanta, Georgia)

Feeling

• the smell of warm gingerbread, peppermint cocoa, and Christmas pine
• all the good food people cook
• cookie exchanges and tree-trimming parties
• being around friends
• Christmas Music....THIS IS the greatest rendition of Silent Night ever. Dont argue me down..I'll refuse to accept it:

• Dont you just LOVE Boyz II Men's Christmas album
• But it's not officially Christmas until you hear this:

• Best Gospel Christmas Album: Kirk Franklin....hands down!
• Mariah has a good Christmas Album too...I love her version of Oh Holy Night (and Im not a Mariah fan by no means..but I do own this album!)
• I Like Celine Dion's album too. Her version of Ava Maria...pure genius!
• But when I was kid...It was all about George Michael and WHAM! (LOL..that song is the cutest to me!)
•  Dern..I just like Christmas music....so many good albums out there.Jackson 5, Stevie Wonder, Motown in general....SO MANY! :)
• When I hear Whitney Houston's "I Love the Lord" from The Preacher's Wife (which is also a Christmas/Gospel album)..I just burst out crying
• cuddling next to a roaring fire....cause Baby It's Cold Outside (yes..I love Vanessa Williams/Bobby Caldwell's version the best!)
• The New Year is vast approaching! Tabula Rasa!
• Watching the tree.....lights flickering...soothing.
• buying for my Goddaughter and mother.
• My brother..who ALWAYS comes thru with the BOMB Christmas gift.
• being the end of the semester..and actually being able to enjoy my time off
• Watchnight service (Maybe I'm the only person who likes going but oh well....)

Not Feeling

• having to COOK all the good food people are eating. It's exhausting..fun but exhausting.
• I dont know WHEN I'll ever go Ice Skating at Centennial Olympic Park or see the tree lighting again.
• No one to cuddle with or exchange "THAT" special present with (LOL). 3 Christmases in a row...solo-dolo...
• I was hoping there would be a mini-Me to do all this cheesy stuff with.
• I dont remember the last time my Dad actually got me a Christmas present. *smh*
• having Christmas surprises SPOILED by the UPS man delivering gifts UNWRAPPED. I mean..we aint doing outer boxes anymore? That's dangerous!
• the smell of chitterlings. I swear..that is a Southern Negro Christmas/NYE staple. BLAH!
• No plans on NYE...and I NEED plans on NYE....(long story there)
• If I hear "What do the Lonely Do at Christmas?"  by The Emotions one more time...It's gonna be a bloody Christmas. That is slit-your-wrist music. *smh* Saddest Christmas song of ALL TIME! Jeesh! (LOL).
• Tied w/ that is Mariah's "I miss you (Most at Christmas time). JEESH! *sniff*
• Never knowing what to get my Dad. EVER. Sweaters it is!
• not seeing my brother. He's always busy...*sigh* One day I'll have Christmas on the Beach in Florida...:)
• The New Year approaches...much trepidation there *sigh*

Pretty Empty Boxes.

My friend (who shall remain nameless) convinced me to, JUST for a short time, and JUST for the New YEar, rejoin a dating site. She joined one too....

I hate to sound bourgie....but...I've noticed that I've had to "dumb myself down" on websites. If I say I am getting a PhD or work in the field that I do....most dudes are confused...or say crazy stuff like.."So..is that the highest degree right?" or.."What u gonna do? Work in a hospital?" or.... just any bevy of things that show me you have no understanding.

I know most of the world isn't as well-read or educated. But at the sake of my sanity, is it wrong of me to ask that a person at least be well educated. As in went to college. Or something of that sort that may have garnered them an accredited degree... I hate having to explain myself...or my goals...or my experiences.

In this respect..Ralph Richard Banks is right. Most African-American men do no have college degrees, so I shouldn't expect them to understand my dedication go education, my job, or goals or what a PhD even stands for. This isnt to say that there are some w/o degrees who are smart and know...(people DO read..I am aware)...but it would be nice, for once, to not have to explain myself or my passionate pursuits of education to men.  I need to go for the guy, regardless of race, who has my same LIFE experiences and can at least understand them. No...he doesn't have to have a Phd..but he mot certainly would have to know what it is...

Men can hit you with all the "Dman baby you so fine" talk...but have a little substance and they glaze over. Some might argue "Well..those dudes want booty anyway"...but it's not just them...it's the more "educated" dudes too. They just want a pretty little box...to fill with lies and foolishness.

Im starting to think that Smart isnt sexy anymore. Or was it EVER sexy? You dont see the scientists of the world winning...with the cute dude on their arm (and yes..there are dimepiece scientists in this world..no doubt...) . NOPE...It's the empty, bobble-head Kim K's of the world. Men want vapid and transparent...if not obtuse...couple with killer curves. (See..and I used  "big" words too....oh yeah...I'n doomed.)

In that world, where does that leave me? Sure I'm attractive to some...but I'm a complete and utter NERDY GEEKY GAL.... Smart and Pretty don't always go together...and in most dating scenarios it doesn't. I can talk about sports, StarTrek (Deep Space 9 vs Next Generation), my fav comics, reality TV, something by Chaucer, hip hop....all in one single conversation. I thought I was being well-rounded. I had no idea that would be a detriment to my dating pool.


So do you all think it's true? Do men want arm candy? Or want a girl with SOME smarts OR may want a girl with smarts...but not a LOT of it?