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Friend Quota Fulfilled

I have enough friends.

I repeat. I have enough fucking friends.


So trust me when I tell you it annoys me to no end when I go out with a guy and he goes. “Well…let’s be friends….kick it…chill.”

Or I’m looking at the on-line profiles; some dude hits me up wayyyyy across on country and goes

“Maybe we can be friends…I know I’m far away”

Or I started to date a guy.I already started to fall for him…and he busts out with the

“I want to just be friends. We can still be cool”

Or you are out in the street minding your own damn business and some bugaboo annoys you and hits you with the “So you cant have no friends??”

Hell fucking naw I cant have no friends.

 I don’t want to have any friends. I have enough friends. My friend quota is fulfilled. PERIOD. with these same, sorry muthafuckers. Matter of fact, I'm purging those friends as we speak. I’m sick of having friends.

If you don’t want to date, get the hell on.  If you aren’t trying to show me off as some arm candy, bounce. If you are not ready for me to dust off my cute shoes and pop the tags off of my dresses, then see ya! I’m over being friends.

Yeah yeah.. The basis of any relationship is a friendship. But guess what….I never heard of a FWB getting her status upgraded. Or a jump going to main breezy. OR anything other than some side-hoe status. It only happens in the movies that the main, hot smoking guy finally realizes that the quirky,” best friend” is his ideal girlfriend and falls madly for her.

Such a bunch of lies they tell chicks on Lifetime and in Harlequin romances….

A friend of mine once told me that her and her husband were never friends. Not to say that they aren’t friendly to one another. But…they have men and woman in their respective lives that fulfill that role. Their role to each other is of spouse, supporter, and lover. Not BFFs. They have BFFs …

And I truly do not need another opposite-sex BFF. Personally..I find the whole “platonic friend” thing too weird. Particularly if I am attracted to that person. There is no way I could suffer in agony, pining away for a guy and hoping one day he will wake up and see how awesome I am. He may never do that. And in reality, he won’t do that.

I want to be “friendly” with my future mate: nice, kind, caring.  But I am not trying to be his BFF. And I am most certainly not trying to be caught up in the trap and ruse of “friendship” when that person has no intentions of truly being a friend or acting like a friend. For me, once I hear those words “Let’s be friends” or “Can’t you make a new friend?” it is easier to just cut ties. And I never use those words. I promise you, I haven’t.  And I won’t.

I have enough friends. I truly do. So your offer of friendship is null and void.

So unless you are looking to fill the spots of boyfriend, mate, significant other… quota is full and fulfilled with about 20 years of being placed in the “friend zone”.

I say…Good Day SIR!


  1. This post right here is just TOO real!! Lol..

  2. ::applause::

    You needed to drop the mic at the end. Cause this was church, tabernacle, mosque...

  3. Yeah, I agree - a friendship request is just lame. It's like, either we're trying to build something real here, or not. But to step to someone with that sounds like someone trying to waste your time. Friends are friends, and intimacy/romance is that.


    @Yakini Either we trying to build something real here or NOT- Needs to be put on a t shirt/bumper sticker/coffee mug/billboard/keychain ALL OF THIS!!!!!

  5. Most of the guys that I have fallen for were my good guy friends and we are still good friends. I actually welcome new guys friends to bring in as I drop some of the old. Fresh blood ya know. But on the whole dating thing, naw I don't need no new friends.

  6. I understand the reticence to add another friend to the pile, but you never know. All of my relationships have been long term friendships, high school pals, college mates, co-workers and look how well that's worked out for me! Wait... on second thought... I don't need no mo damn friends!


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