Skip to main content

A Big D*ck.. Big Heartache

I remember dating a guy briefly when I was in college. We had talked for quite some time and finally decided to go out. He was gorgeous. Smart, kind...very much a gentleman and had a great family. He was into many philanthropic and service organizations. We had a great first date... and subsequent dates. 

Finally, when it was time to "do the damn thing"..I was so hype. Surely this thing was gonna be OFF THE CHARTS! We had so much chemistry. Brotherman dropped them drawers and.........


His penis was tiny. I mean TINY!  I had to look at it twice. Maybe he wasn't "ready". Maybe he was nervous. Was it drafty in here? Nope...none of those things. I couldn't believe it. It was like the thumb of a 3 year old. No gerth. No length. So do you know what I did??

I faked "fragile".  Meaning I was like.."Oh hun..I dont wanna rush this! Maybe we need to take it slow!!". He, being a gentleman, obliged. And that was the end of that. I sorta brushed him off and played him to the left after that. I was young. I couldnt look past the penis..I was like..does he need a pump. Do I need to learn sometechinques? I wasn't willing to compromise.  And the young man and I just became friends.

Now that I am divorced and single, I keep thinking about that time in college when I played a very sweet guy with a tiny wanker to the left.  I'm not even sure if dude remembers me or that incident Looking back, . I mean what has a big dick gotten me? A bunch of pain (no pun intended) and heartache. All that motion in the ocean just left me empty inside..

Does size truly matter?

I've been lucky (in that respect) that I've never encountered another man THAT small. I have seen small..but it was still something to work with. Can you be in love with a man who's size would NOT even be a drop in the bucket? You know for a fact no matter what you can do or positions you can try,  he just may not be able to measure up (Boy..the puns keep rolling in this joint...LOL). Either way, do you throw the baby out with the bathwater? Do you forget about the shortcomings (lol) and press on because he's awesome?

I posed the quesiton to my girls and it was split. The die hard romantics versus the Die hard freaks. Some in both groups are married. The romantics said you could "learn to love and adjust"..the freaks said "you need a cruise ship..not a tug boat".  Where is the middle ground? Do you sacrifice  emotional happiness for sexual happiness? or vice-versa?

I spoke to the guy earlier this year. Just to catch up. He's just as sweet, kind, and yes...still single (hmmmm..wonder if it's the penis thing...but anyway....). It made me wonder.

Could a big d*ck just be a bunch of big heartache???


  1. Was it really as small as a 3year old thumb?

    This post is something to think about.

    I don't know if I could deal but at the same time, I am a romantic and I would give him a chance. Also I can be a little freaky and would want to at least feel something.

    His overall character would be great to have as a man in someone's life. However, if he cannot satisfy then the female may cheat to get that satisfaction.

    Then this great man will be hurt and it may have already happened to him before and that is why he is single.

    Then again he may be single at the right time for you.

    This is something to think about.
    Thanks for the posts.

  2. Also, it isn't about being freaky , freak or anything like that. It is about being physically, mentally and emotionally satisfied. He may not be able to satisfy physically.

  3. A potential life partner should be the total package - as Alexis says, stimulating you not only mentally and emotionally, but physically as well! I definitely would be turned off by the size of that package, initially anyway.... as far as whether or not I'd have thrown in the towel - its so hard to say. I guess it depends on just how "great" things were in all other areas (ie, conversation, equally yoked, intellect, sense of humor, etc.)

    I too wonder why he is single today. He seems like such a good catch in all other areas. Hmmmm, it does make you wonder.

  4. Hilarious post.

    The die hard romantics versus the Die hard freaks. Makes one know the answers before being answered.

    I eel bad for dude, though. So lucky, yet so unlucky.

  5. @Don..what you mean "lucky but unlucky?" Cause he came up on "midget"? LMAO!

  6. I think size matters but if you have the size, its almost just as important to know what and how to use it. I had a similar story, where I met a guy who my perfect match and had the same dilemma. I remember getting ready to do the "do" and reaching down there, thinking he hadn't reached his full potential (or at least thats what I had hoped). I thought having a penis that small was a myth but it wasn't and what made it so bad he was 6'4 with big feet. In the end I would've married him and ran off in the sand (small penis and all) but things didn't work out. Found slightly bigger ones to work with but its still not him =/


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

2018: A Year Without Fear

I used to make these lofty, resolution goals each year. The older I got, the grander my ideas became. That is until I reached the age of 30 and my entire life shifted.

At the time, I was divorced, living totally on my own, trying to rebuild myself financially and trying to figure out my next move toward happiness. That was at the time I started this blog.... which started out as my chronicling the dating and mating of a 30 something divorcee' in the South's Largest Metropolis. I was trying to date. I was trying to establish myself financially. And I was trying to find my purpose.

So much has changed in the almost 9 years since I started this blog. I've traveled alone. I gained and lost friends. I got into a Ph.D. program. I got re-married. I lost my mother, my best friend.... not to mention my uncle, cousin, and aunt. I gained a sweet baby girl.  I went from getting my bliss.... to trying to balance that bliss with my own life..... Yet in trying to find the balance, I alw…

Frat Boys, Toxic Masculinity and the #METOO Movement

(scene from Spike Lee's famous School Daze)

A few weeks ago, my sorority held its national convention on New Orleans. Coincidently, another fraternity was also holding their national convention in New Orleans. Naturally, the jokes, mostly in jest, played upon the fact that these two groups, full of single, attractive and smart folks would be "on the prowl" and looking to "hook up" in the city known for its strong drinks, Southern heat, and hospitality. It was all jokes until nastiness decided to rear its ugly head.

You had men in the other fraternity sexually harassing and being obscene to my sorority sisters who just wanted to have fun and handle the business of the sorority (and network.. and yes.. meet men in a somewhat safe space).  There were stories of men groping women. Men saying disgusting things and then being like "Well fuck you then" if women rejected them. You would HOPE and think that college-educated men wouldn't act this way.


The Ides of Birthdays

My 39th birthday is in two weeks.
You know, I feel like I write the same type of blog around my birthday every year. I get extremely introspective and pensive about the whole thing. But this is my last year of my 30s and I am feeling all of the feelings that have ever and could be felt. I hate trying to bring this up to folks.. who are always wanting to remind you of "well.. you got this.. you got that...". As if you haven't dealt with depression long enough to realize it doesn't matter what you have... if one piece is missing.. it throws it all off.
While yesterday was the 3rd anniversary of my mom's passing, I realized she wouldn't be here for my 40th. That was a hard pill to swallow. I thought for sure we'd be celebrating a lot that year... my Ph.D... a baby... a big, fancy car..... all of that. I only have one of those things so far but still... I was hoping that having her hold on at least until then would be the icing on my cake.
My life feels…